What The Trump?!

Dear Hearts,

I am ashamed. But I happy.

I am happy Trump won the presidency.

But I feel like I ought to feel bad about it. I was in The Never Trump camp.

(I’m so tired. In 2000, my dad and I stayed up all night to watch the election. I went to bed around 2 a.m. CT. Just after Hillary official conceded. I guess I’m not 23 anymore. I was student teaching then. However, in 2000 being able to watch something on the online the next day was not a given.)

History was made last night. All the pollsters, and hipster, and rock n’ rollers, holy rollers, and mamas pushing baby strollers were dead wrong.

History was made last night whether it’s good or bad…we’ll have to wait and see.

I am a Republican. I will proudly keep on wearing my GOP hat with my Reagan/Bush pin.

Trump is the first elected president to never have previously held a political office and/or served in the military.

I have had my Trump/Pence bumper sticker for a while now. I crossed Trump out with a Sharpie and circled Pence’s name some scandal. Around the time everyone was calling for Trump to step down—even Condi. I can’t remember what that scandal was about now.

Rubio. Rubio has been my guy for four years. After he dropped out, I pulled his bumper sticker off my car. It came off in pieces like Rubio’s heart.

Reagan is my hero. I was raised on Reagan. And the Bush Dynasty. HW is a good, moral man. His mistake: not going all the way to Baghdad in Gulf War I. I was inspired by W., who made some major mistakes: No Child Left Behind; Intelligent Design; limiting stem cell research; and the Bail-Out.

There are no more Reagans or Bushes.

At Burning Bed, when I was working on organizing the library, I found Hard Choices by Hillary Clinton. Instead of throwing putting in the donation pile (like I did to one of that communist Larsson’s books) I stood Hillary up on the bottom shelf and it “prominently displayed.” Below a stack of Bibles.

I was trying to come to terms with the fact that Hillary was going to win and be the president. I have not liked her since 1992 (I was like 13/14 then). I don’t trust her and I don’t think is a good person. I never have. The idea that she would be our first woman president was sickening to me. When I started watching the coverage last night, I felt physical disgust until I realized Trump had a chance.

This election was always about “Whom do you hate less?” I debated and debated and searched my conscience about voting for Trump.

I don’t think that Trump is a good man or has any morals either. I’d like to hope he does. Although to his credit, his kids turned out very well. Now Ivanka—I could get behind her.

For me, it was anybody but the Clintons back in the White House.

Last night I found myself cheering as the returns came in. Then I felt less like it was my abhorrence of Hillary and more that I wanted Trump to win.

WHY?

I deeply identify with the GOP. They could have and should have stopped Trump a long time ago. I wanted my team to win. I think Melania is classy. (Her $250,000 wedding dress was exquisite—oh Dior!) Trump is not the GOP—or is he? I don’t know.

I think that Trump has said a HUGE amount of bat-shit crazy stuff to appeal to one crowd or another. I think it’s entirely possible that he bought a big part of this election. I think the real Trump is the Trump I saw in the acceptance speech. I hope so.

I don’t think Trump molests women. He is far too smart of a businessman to be so stupid.

Hillary—BENGHAZI—I feel kinda bad for her. She’s over. Done. She has nothing now. Will Chelsea and Co. be enough for her? I hope so. She gave up love to be a politician.

I don’t think Trump ever thought he’d get as far as he did—but when he started winning, he was not going to lose. Trump is not going to do a quarter of the stuff he’s threatened or promised. Obama’s top priority was Gitmo and it’s still open!

I wish a candidate with morals had won. Hell, even Obama has morals. He is a good man. I’d like to have a cigarette and coffee with the man. (Yes, he still smokes. Duh.)

Trump did it. Trump won America with all the democrats undeniably against him and without much help from the GOP Establishment.

I guess everyone is tired of business as usual. I think that’s what Hillary represented. And to have Bill back in the White House after he fucked and intern and shoved a cigar in her pussy. There I said it! It’s true. And, it’s fucking gross. You don’t do that in the Oval. Unless your Fitz and Olivia.

Trump may be unprincipled, but at least he’s “honest” about it. America needs a change. We really do. Cops being assassinated in the streets. Free speech limited in the classroom. Safe spaces. Iran going nuclear.

It wasn’t the “White-Trash” vote that put him over the edge. What cemented Trump’s victory were people like me (my NY vote didn’t count anyway) who just quietly voted for Trump. I bet the better of Trump GOP-enemies voted for him.

Krauthammer said last night on TV that this is a Reaganesque Revolution.

Trump is what most politicians are—he just says it out loud.

I didn’t do a write in, because that was the same as not voting. And, as I thought of my write I was thinking, Gee, I hope Trump wins. I decided to be intellectually honest and just vote for the man.

I thought I might have a profound point here.

People want heroes.

We want to look up to the president and say, “Yeah, he has got America.” Trump gave that to a lot of people.

As long as Melania doesn’t fuck with any Jackie-décor at the White House, I’m cool with her. I may even like her. At least she has style.

My mother is crushed and my dad is elated. I think Aunt Faerie and Bugsy are moving to the South of France. Shit. Who’s gonna feed me and G-Pa now? I feel like the GOP, me, my party are not the losers. (For the record Aunt Faerie did not approve of my censoring the Larsson book. She didn’t say anything—that’s how I know she didn’t approve. But he was a bloody subversive communist.)

I felt I had a stake in the Bush years. I want to have a stake again. I have had that in eight years. Maybe voting for Trump is just symptomatic of my being crazy and having anxiety-daddy issues.

Or maybe Trump and the new First Lady are the first of their ilk in the White House. Maybe it is a revolution. Maybe it’s throwing out the baby and the bathwater and starting all over again. With a crazy plan—because the sensible plan failed.

Maybe that’s what I identify with.

America never stopped being great.

WE THE PEOPLE are America. It's our morality, standards, values, and ideals that propel this Great Country forward. No matter what happens tomorrow will be much the same for us. The good and the bad. Our Founding Fathers built our country that way--no one person or group in control. So I am proud to be an American.

Maybe Trump can help me drain my swamp too.

Rubio 2020?

Smoke ‘em if ya’ got ‘em. God Bless

In the name of The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit; Mother Mary, Saint Brigid; Saint Jude; Saint Therese Lisieux; Saint Peter; Archangel Michael, and my Guardian Angel, Jed.

PS: AT LEAST THE ELECTION IS OVER! HALLE-FUCKING-JULAH!